Laura Dern was on stage presenting an award at the Golden Globes on Sunday night. I had no clue who Laura Dern even was until I saw who she was. Of course. Jurassic Park lady. That’s who she is. I am unsure as to where she acquired the Laura Dern moniker, but I guess everyone can refer to her as whatever they desire. As for me, I’ll know her only for Jurassic Park. That thought crossed my mind right away as I watched the Golden Globes in real time. I decided to tweet about it on the Twitter. Here, you can read said tweet.
The mentions were quickly flooded (by one person) with information that was news to me: Laura Dern, also known as the female lead in Jurassic Park, is dating Baron Davis. I had to divert my attention away from the wonderful Golden Globes program to confirm/deny this piece of information. It seemed too ridiculous to be factual, but a simple google search corroborated what I, just mere moments before, believed to be untrue. What a revelation. Jurassic Park lady and B-Diddy. The woman who went arm deep in Triceratops shit and reset the circuit breakers for all of Jurassic Park amidst a terrifying dino jail break and the man who’s looked like he’s 40 years old since he was 24. It’s like a Mad Libs. My new favorite couple in Hollywood.
For the amount of time I spend on the Twitter, I have a concerning disconnect into the dating scene. I literally have no idea who’s dating who and who’s married to who. Too many egos to keep tabs on. But I’ll never forgive myself for being late to the party on Baronosaurus. Is that a thing? Can we make it a thing? I think I nailed that one.