Hanukkah Pitting Their 1st Night Up Against Christmas Eve Is A Bad Idea

Disclaimer: I had no idea how to spell Hanukkah.  Had to type what I thought was correct into Google only to be quickly humbled once again.  It’s one of those words I’ll struggle with until the end of time.  And why are there two spellings for Hanukkah?  What’s the deal with that?

Word on the holiday cheer-filled streets is that Hanukkah Night 1 and Christmas Eve are the same day.  Brutal scheduling by the Jews.  Someone’s getting fired for that executive decision because Christmas Eve is winning this fight in a bloodbath.  As a participant in both holidays’ festivities, it’s blatantly obvious that Hanukkah doesn’t hold a candle to Christmas (HOLIDAY PUN).  Opening a present eight days in a row is cool and all, but opening up a slew of presents one after the other and trying to stack the boxes sky high is an event everyone looks forward to.  When you open up a bunch of presents at once, the bad gifts don’t stand out.  If you get a shitty gift for Hanukkah, that is your one present for that 24-hour span, and there’s nothing you can do except wait for the next day.

Also the Hanukkah food sucks.  Potato latkes are fire, but that’s it.  Gelt, those little chocolate coins in gold wrappers, stinks.  Gelt is horrible.  What other Hanukkah foods are there?  Nada.  Christmas cookies alone overshadow the entire holiday of Hanukkah if you ask me.  Decorations: advantage Christmas in blowout fashion.  Music: advantage Christmas by a mile; Adam Sandler’s Hanukkah songs are dope, but that’s all there is to look forward to.  I can’t give a comprehensive summary on the story of Christmas, so the jury’s still out on that one.  But it’s Christmas in a rout.  Next year don’t put your first night and star player up against Christmas Eve.  December 24th is untouchable.  Call me when the Tribe draws up a music video like this.

It’s a Christmas Massacre.  And speaking of Christmas massacre…


Recent Blogs:

Top 10 Videos Of 2016 – #6 Water Bottle Flip

Two Major L’s Were Handed Out On Twitter Yesterday

Top 10 Videos Of 2016 – #7 Little League World Series Kid

Top 10 Videos Of 2016 – #8 Beast Mode Rugby Kid

Top 10 Videos Of 2016 – #9 Planet Earth Chase


.

.

.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s