I’m sure it’s of little surprise, but the Hammer clan is blessed with natural athleticism. We seriously do it all. Add US Open at age 15 to the long list of accomplishments. Cousin Cole shot a 77 today at the US Open, and he’s only 15. He was +7, but I mean he beat this guy named Tiger Woods. What a bum that guy is now. Life is in complete shambles, broken down old ass body, and he got his ass kicked by this prepubescent prodigy (and literally almost everybody else). It’s a proud day to be a Hammer. Humility goes out the window when you’re playing side by side with the world’s best. I will say that it’s not a great look for him to not know who MC Hammer is or what his claim to fame is. Gotta pay homage to our ancestors, that’s day one stuff. That means every time an adult has dropped the “Can’t touch this” line on him, he just laughed awkwardly but it was only because he didn’t know what it meant. Let this be a lesson.
Note to self: next time I play in the US Open, I MUST bring a colorful goon squad with me. And just invite the annoying fat kid from the get go to avoid the “he tells his mom who tells your mom who tells you to invite him” situation.