Top 5 Super Bowl XLIX Commercials

Not sure which comeback was better, the Patriots or Missy Elliott (slight edge Missy), but I almost needed heart palpitations last night. It was a rollercoaster of emotions, but that’s what it’s all about. Football is awesome. (Quick side note: I don’t know how people without their team playing don’t bet on the Super Bowl.) The commercials for the most part were subpar. I’m pretty sure we’ve been let down with the commercials for the past few years, last night no exception. A couple way too serious ones too, holy moly. I want beer and laughs, not kids dying and amputees. But there were a few gems as always. Here’s the top 5 (honorable mention: the Skittles arm wrestling ad):

5. (Squarespace) feat. Jeff Bridges


The dude from The Big Lebowski! Classic Jeff Bridges. Haven’t seen his face in years. I kinda just assumed he was dead at this point. You can’t just go disappearing like that and dropping a bomb in the form of a fire super bowl commercial on us. But I’m glad you did. It was weird, real weird. But it was oddly interesting and unexplainably hilarious.


4. Kia Sorento “The Perfect Getaway” feat. Pierce Brosnan


More cameos! More cameos! Pierce Brosnan is as mysterious and cool as they come. You just don’t see it nowadays. He’s 61 by the way, crazy stuff. Ages well, that’s a good looking man. One day Mrs. Doubtfire is peppering your jumbalaya, then you’re James Bond, now you’re making a guest appearance on the Kia Sorento promo. Just how Pierce drew it up. Funny stuff. Once James Bond, always James Bond.


3. Loctite Glue “Positive Feelings”


Honestly I have no idea what this is but it was laugh out loud funny from beginning to end. A bunch of weird old people in fanny packs dancing to dubstep will never not be funny. And the lady sitting on that dude’s lap at the end was the icing on the cake. 10 out of 10 would watch and enjoy again.


2. Avocados From Mexico “First Draft Ever”


Sometimes you know a commercial is going to be funny within the first 3 seconds. This was one of those times. I’m fairly certain this is how it happened too. Why do you think there’s no koalas in the United States? It’s not because of the climate, it’s because Australia drafted them to a lifetime contract. Imagine if there was a re-draft? We would have to make a few changes in the animal department. Too many deer and birds and useless animals. Also, the ‘Avocados from Mexico’ jingle is too catchy to ignore.


1. Budweiser “Best Buds”


Horses and puppies together will always get the top spot in my book. Majestic horse, adorable puppy, paired with an unbreakable bond of friendship. I eat that shit up every time. Watching the puppy in the box in the rain made me want to run outside and find him myself. And when the horses came to his defense as he barked at the wolf, there were tears of joy all over my floor. A real mess to clean up if we’re being honest. Ugh and then the sprint back towards his owner, just stop it.

PS – Katy Perry was average at best. Lenny Kravitz was weird and boring (as I said). Missy Elliott killed it and should perform on her own next year.


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