Charlie Sheen Pulls Knife On Dentist While High On Coke

EliteDaily: According to TMZ, the LAPD is investigating Sheen after the actor allegedly went after a dentist with a knife. Yes, you read that right. Apparently, Sheen was at a dental office in Los Angeles last week while high on cocaine. When the dental technician went to give him some laughing gas, Sheen freaked out on her and became violent. The dentist rushed in and Charlie whipped out a knife. Luckily, nobody was injured during the incident. But, it certainly is disconcerting. It seemed as if Sheen had turned a corner in his life. Maybe he’s worse off than we thought. No charges have been filed as of yet, but Sheen could face battery and felony assault with a deadly weapon.


He’s back baby! That’s what I’m talking about! Ladies and gentlemen this is what we need going on around us. In the midst of the Ebola outbreak and Isis beheading everyone, Charlie Sheen freaking out at the dentist’s office is so refreshing and reassuring that all is right in the world. Let crazy people be crazy and enjoy the ride. The more Charlie Sheen in the news the better, and I won’t hear any arguments about that.

If we’re being completely honest here, I don’t think his insanity or his passion for narcotics sparked this outbreak. The dentist’s office is one of the worst places in the world. Every time I go there I am a nervous wreck, totally uneasy and on edge. Between the noises and the sharp tools and my inability to communicate with words, I feel totally helpless. Gotta have your head on a swivel at all times. And they push the envelope man let me tell you. “Oh does this hurt? No? Okay how about this?” I can’t even count how many times I’ve almost pulled a knife on my dentist. Swear to god they’re on filling away from being on the wrong side of a headline.

Charlie Sheen back in the news makes me so happy you have no idea. I’m gonna follow this guy like a hawk now. He has the “I’m gonna do whatever I want because who the fuck are you” mentality that is morning but commendable and admirable. I for one cannot get enough of Charlie Sheen, I think I love him.

PS- What the fuck is with dentists trying to have full conversations with me while I’m basically incapacitated in their chair of death? Bro your fingers are in my mouth and you’re making my mouth hurt and my gums bleed. You wanna talk? Sit me up, drop the scalpel, and take off the gloves. And I’m not trying to be your friend dude, I fucking hate you. Clean my teeth, tell me I need to brush better, give me a goody bag so I can have my 34th toothbrush at home, and send me on my fucking way. Spare me with that.

 

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