I Will Hit 1 Out Of My First 3 Attempts From Half Court

This has been a popular topic of debate over the past few weeks amongst my group of close friends. We’ve been watching videos of the Gonzaga girl hitting a half court shot for $1500. And the dude from Drexel who won FREE Jimmy Johns for a year. If these kids can do it, why not me? I truly think that if I was taking a half court shot in front of 10,000 with tuition or jimmy johns on the line, there’s no doubt in my mind that ball is going in. I thrive under pressure. You put me in the spotlight, I’m gonna shine. But that’s neither here nor there.

Science says that the odds of making a half court shot for someone who never played high school basketball is 1 in 50. I didn’t play in high school, but I played during high school. So I’ll put my odds (based on these findings) at 1 out of 20. And then you have to factor in my natural athleticism, ability to succeed, confidence, and poise under pressure. I’m not saying I will hit 1 out of every 3, that’s crazy town. But if you give me 3 chances right now, I will hit 1. The first shot is for measure, odds are it will probably go in. The second shot, obviously, is for adjustment purposes. And then the third is for final execution and perfection. Every time I have brought this up into conversation, there have been doubters and haters. I probably won’t even need all 3 shots, and I’ll just let one of the criticizers take the 3rd shot while I have my back turned on my way out the door.

This will be put to the test in the very near future. I’m gonna need 1 person to video tape, 1 licensed referee (I don’t want anyone conspiracies regarding traveling or any kind of shooting violation), 1 person to retrieve the rebound (in the event that I even miss), and 1 person to hand me an unopened Glacier Freeze Gatorade after I hit that shot. Also, I’ve been searching for companies to sponsor me, so this is a great opportunity for anyone looking to market their brand in a positive way in the world of sports.


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