Not even remotely impressed with Skywire

Who does this Nik Wallenda guy think he is? Where does he get the audacity to spell his name like that? N-I-K? (Rock, R-O-K? Yeah so what’s your point?… R-O-C-K! The C is silent) Give me a break Nik. Real quick, just so everyone knows, he didn’t walk across the Grand Canyon. He went across the river on the Navajo Nation near the Grand Canyon. We’re all suckers for buying into that nonsense. On site were 600 spectators, a Navajo Nation ranger, camera crew, and a paramedic. Why a paramedic? What’s he gonna do? “Yeah Nik took a nice fall 1500 feet down to his death, I’m gonna run down and see if he needs some gauze.” And the Navajo Ranger said, “I know I wouldn’t even attempt something like that.” Look at this joker spreading some knowledge on the situation, good call bro.

Not impressed, by the way. Do you really think that Discovery Channel had any doubts? Do you think this country would risk letting the whole country basically watch some guy kill himself on national TV? For sure not. Anyone who really thought he might fall may as well live in Crazy Town. Last year he walked across a tightrope over Niagra Falls, which was way more exciting than yesterday. I speak for everyone when I say I wanted him to fall yesterday. When he was thanking Jesus for “calming that cable”, I had enough. Then he started getting cocky, taking a knee, thanking the Discover Channel, and then sprinted to the finish. Get out of my face, Wallenda. I’ll be impressed if he walks across the Atlantic. This country needed him to fall. People need to see something like that, total wake up call. It’s not all sunshines and rainbows. Not every story has a happy ending. He can only walk across so many tightropes before he loses concentration for a split second and slips and falls. SPLAT.

By the way, did anyone hear his daughter in the interviews? The girl is a straight up IDIOT.

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One thought on “Not even remotely impressed with Skywire

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